Elopement Advice

a.k.a. Ara’s exceptionally biased and alarmingly specific opinions

Outfits

  • Dresses: I love fabric that moves and flows with wind. Bright white satin typically picks up all the colors around it, so I recommend avoiding it. Colors other than white are wonderful out in nature (red, purple, black, champagne, rose, blue, green…). Silk and lace tend to photograph very well. Here are some of my favorite places to look at dresses: BHLDN, Mywony, Mumu, French Knot Couture, Etsy, and your local bridal boutiques

  • Veils: I LOVE veils, especially flowy and thin ones that move with the wind. Do some research and see if there’s a style that fits you

  • Suits & More: Pick a color and style that makes you happy. If you’re a jeans and vest person, go for it. If you’re a fitted green suit soul, I’m in. Consider gray, green, blue, brown, and even patterns as an alternative to black. I don’t recommend just a white shirt with no jacket or vest (it picks up a surprising amount of light and can clash with the white of a dress)

  • Fit: It is absolutely, 100% worth getting your dress or suit altered to fit you properly. Feeling comfortable and confident is important—it’s incredibly frustrating to have misbehaving clothing on such an exciting day!

  • Durability: Wedding dresses are surprisingly resilient. Don’t worry too much about mud, dirt or sand! Red wine at a wedding reception is reliably more destructive

  • Details: Cut the off larger tags and under-arm/hanger loops so they don’t pop out uninvited, and make sure the tails are loose on your suit jacket if it has a back flap (there are often little threads holding it together, usually white)

  • Prepare: Try your wedding outfits on within the week of your event just to make sure everything fits well. If you have a bustle or corset back on your dress, familiarize yourself with how it works and how long it takes to get is into place. If your partner is helping you get dressed, practice with them. I can also always help day-of!

  • Undergarments: Bring undergarments that work with your outfits, and test them in advance. It’s demoralizing to realize you have the wrong color, or the lines show right through your dress

  • Opinions: Leading up to the day, feel free to rope me into your decisions. I’m happy to chat at any point if you need assistance or opinions. If you’re out dress shopping, text me with your favorites! I love it!

Shoes

  • Boots: If we are hiking or on uneven ground, I’d recommend either wearing your hiking boots or a pair of nicer boots with traction (think Frye, Ariat, Samuel Hubbard, Pikolinos)

  • Sandals: If water or warmer weather is involved and traction is required, I adore Chacos. Many of my couples have worn them, and you can even completely customize a pair with embroidery (dates, names, etc.)

  • Hidden: If you can’t see your shoes under your dress, wear something that gives you confidence and stability

  • Dress shoes: Some dress shoes have great traction! Look at those soles and check it out. If they look slippery, consider wearing another pair of shoes until you want to rock the dress pair

  • Get fancy: Yes darlings, you can wear your Jimmy Choo, Louboutin or Prada heels at a waterfall. Tuck them in your backpack, wear something practical on the approach, and change before the ceremony. Easy!

  • Barefoot: Yes! Bring shoes to walk in on the way to the site

Vows / Ceremony

  • Take your time! Longer, meaningful ceremonies make for fabulous memories and lots of candid photographs. There is no need to rush. Consider having your officiant speak about your love story, what you love about each other, your future hopes and dreams, and perhaps some readings you both enjoy

  • Prepare meaningful vows. If you’re eloping alone, or with a group of your favorite humans, really pouring your heart into your vows is so worthwhile. If you don’t want to read them in front of anyone, let’s find a private spot separate from your ceremony

  • Consider a hand-fasting ceremony (flashback to Gretna Green), putting love letters into a box, a sand ceremony, and other meaningful additions

  • Print or write your vows by hand—it’s much more photogenic than a phone, and you can keep them for later!

Guests

  • When possible, invite people who will bring light and joy to your wedding day, and leave everyone else behind. If that means just the two of you, great! Eloping alone can be a huge gift to yourselves!

  • Give your guests plenty of detail about what’s involved, as most people aren’t accustomed to elopements. Map waypoints and directions, recommended footwear, hike length and terrain, dress code, jackets needed, bathroom availability, where they should go after the ceremony, etc. are all good things to tell your family and friends. If anyone in your group is chronically late, tell them an earlier meeting time to avoid stress, or have them carpool with other guests who will keep them on track

  • Phones: While I heartily recommend the “unplugged” feel so people are engaged in the event and don’t have phones/iPads in front of their faces, it’s 100% up to you if you want your guests to have their phones out during your ceremony. I encourage you to tell people in advance, and have your officiant announce your desires before the ceremony starts

Etcetera

  • Make a plan for how you’ll tie your tie. It sounds silly, but in an age where we don’t use ties every day of the week, it pays to be prepared

  • Hair & makeup almost always takes longer than advertised, so build in extra time (even past what your artist recommends)

  • Stress sucks, so allow plenty of time for traffic, missed exits, gas/water stops, and random wedding day luck

  • Bathroom breaks: not every location has a bathroom, so plan on stopping on the way (and encourage any guests to do the same)

  • Use sunblock in advance of your wedding. That kayaking trip, hot-day hike, or swimming adventure will leave tan lines and show when you pop on your strapless or low-back dress